Making Marriage Work

Making Marriage Work

article by Alice S.M Lee

I enjoy watching elderly couples  who hold hands and treat each other as if they were on their first date. Their 'golden marriage' must have with-stood more than just the test of time, for them to enjoy wedded bliss right into their twilight years. They must have stayed together through thick and thin, for better o for worse.

Being able to survive  a marriage for 40, 50 or 60 years is an achievement. With divorce rates on the rise, we can't help but admire the these  elderly, affectionate couples and assumes that their marriage must be filled with love and fulfillment. What does it take for a marriage to last through the decades?

Romantic love alone will not ensure that a marriage can last because it is almost impossible for someone to remain in state of love permanently. The feeling of being in love comes and goes. So, if love isn't the ingredient, what is?

We are often mislead by the story-book ending of a married couple 'living happily ever after'. In reality, no lasting relationship survives without hard work. It is quite impossible to live with another person in the same house without problems arising. Every marriage experiences tension. The only difference is, happy couples do not just walk away, they have learned to deal with their problems.

Elderly couples who are happily married have learnt to live with their spouse with tolerance, even though their patience might wear thin at times. They have accepted each other's fault and are willing to compromise.

Any long -lasting relationship is rarely perfect. So arguments are normal. In fact, it would be worrying if couples stop disagreeing with one another because it takes too much energy. At least, by continuing to bicker and complain, it's a good sign that they are still making an effort to communicate with each other.

Arguments generally do no harm, as long as you do not get mean, sarcastic or show contempt for your spouse. Make an attempt to change the mood as soon as possible to bring about an early reconciliation. In reality, no one can stay mad forever.

Long-term marriage thrive on the benefits together rather than being on one's own. The different phases of a marital relationship are fraught with challenges: adjusting as newly-weds, the arrival of children, balancing a career, the children leaving the nest, and finally retirement and coping with old age.

Life brings unpredictable circumstances. Happiness, sadness, success, disappointments and failures- all these are part of sharing a life together.

Couples are committed to loving and caring for each other,but there a times where they might hate spouses due to some differences. Keeping an eye closed, turning a deaf ear- these have worked wonders for many couples. They do not sweat the small stuff. Instead, they focus their energy on doing the right thing for the right reasons.

Many grows up believing that marriage is forever.  It can be, if both parties are wiling to work at it. 

mak izz simpan dari tahun bila tak ingat dah...

its a newspaper cutting actually

simpan dalam personal note book

just to share dengan semua 

Have a Great Day!

Selamat Berpuasa~